The naive optimism of attempting to go Christmas shopping on a Sunday and emerge intact! Who did I think I was?
Nat Locke
After reading that Roxy Jacenko’s 10-year-old daughter is set to retire at the age of fifteen, I now look at every pre-teen and wonder where they’re going wrong.
We’re supposed to get smarter with age, right? So, why, WHY do I wish for the weather to get warmer, when - as I recently discovered all over again - I actually hate the heat.
If you’re not one of those super smug people who finished their Christmas shopping in May, why not take up the gift suggestions from your social media algorithm? Hilarity will surely ensue.
Behind every perfect snap of my purring cat is the reality of it depositing various dead creatures around the house.
Christmas trees going up in October, carols being played in November: does going early on festive cheer mean you run out of fa-la-las to give come the big day?
I don’t usually get days off, so when I had one recently, I was skipping around like I was in an antihistamine commercial, no longer bothered by hayfever. I was practically gambolling.
NAT LOCKE
Yes, it’s that annual exercise of damning the appropriation of an American tradition, and pretending you’re not home when someone knocks on the door.
When Nat Locke caught up with a former teacher, she realised their memories of school camp were just as awful as hers.
When it was reported the UK government might ask citizens to simply wear a jumper to combat an energy crisis, it reminded me that Mums everywhere have that policy in response to, well, everything.
As West Australians take to the road for the holidays, spare a thought for the pioneers of the family road trip, who had no iPad or personal headphones, only endless Eye Spy and sibling squabbles.
I hardly ever injure myself, except for all the times I do. So here are just a few of the causes, from an errant cow to a particularly eye-catching dog, a slight step and a hankering for potato.
When we’ve been so obsessed with footy, a comedown is inevitable. What now? We’ve made the classic mistake of doing the most fun thing at the start of the school holidays and it’s downhill from here.
SAS Australia is fascinating viewing but who are these courageous (and possibly disturbed) people lining up to take part? It seems like a terrible idea to me.
If there’s a lesson to be learned from Melania — that is a sentence I never thought I’d utter — it’s that sometimes we have to put our own needs first.
Spending regrets, I’ve had a few. But no matter how much expensive and unused cameras I own, or what I shelled out for thread in my cross-stitch phase, at least I never spent $8000 on an ostrich.
Say what you will about criminals in jail, but they are keeping the art of letter-writing alive. It makes me reminisce about my teenage years, when penpals weren’t just for prisoners.
I’ve come to the realisation I’m not normal: so many of the things that other people love are on my loathe list.
It is one of the great truths of dog parks that they are populated by the same sorts of people — and canines — the world over. And so, behold, my zoological study.
Our vaccination rates are appalling on a world scale. There is hesitancy mixed in with complacency that some think we might be able to incentivise our way out of.
There are times when the anonymous note to your neighbour is the right thing to do. And then there are times when it is really, really not.
I’ve done some extreme activities in my time: jumping out of a plane, whitewater rafting, abseiling. Nothing compares to the adrenaline rush of taking a cat to the vet.
When I told people I was going on holiday to Broome alone, they were taken aback. I assured them I was looking forward to my mini-adventure — and that half the appeal was being on my own.
If men-only club members just talked about football, car racing and things on special at Bunnings, there wouldn’t be an issue. But they’re forging alliances and women don’t have a seat at the table.
© West Australian Newspapers Limited 2022
