OPINION: Can’t see for looking

Where are my bl.... glasses? I don’t know how many times a day I ask myself or someone else that question.

Having had issues with my eyes as a child I had quite regular check-ups with the optometrist and some years ago it was suggested I should get glasses and maybe bifocals would be a good option for me.

Wrong! Despite all the instructions and advice, I just couldn’t manage close work with them.

I looked like some demented creature as I tried to work out how to see a book or the computer with them. Driving was fine as long as I only wanted to look straight ahead.

When I returned to the optometrist it was suggested I just have reading glasses because my long-distance vision was pretty good.

I was much happier with them although I didn’t really find that I had to use them very often.

Fast forward a few more years and suddenly everything in the world has dramatically shrunk, thus forcing me to wear my glasses more and more — or do the long arm stretch. When you have very short arms it doesn’t work.

I am convinced labels on foods, instruction manuals, recipe books and magazines have all reduced the size of their print by 75 per cent.

Most inconvenient, as I now find myself needing my glasses more and more often.

Which brings me to the point of this column — where the heck are my glasses when I need them?

I have one pair in the office and one pair up the house, so you would think it wouldn’t be too big a problem. Wrong!

If I was one of those super-organised people who put their glasses back in the case each time they finish with them there wouldn’t be a problem.

If you’ve been reading my columns for any length of time it will be very obvious I’m not that kind of person.

I spend more time looking for my glasses than it takes me to read whatever I want them for.

At times I am determined to manage without them but even in the brightest of light I usually get defeated and the search is on.

It’s a wonder my husband hasn’t threatened to superglue them to my face!

And yes, I have been known to search for them only to find them sitting on my head.